I know alcohol does different things to different people. Some people are fun drunks, others are mean. Some people back out, others remember everything. Still, I find myself surprised at its effect on me.
A week of sobriety made me grumpy and gave me difficulty sleeping (thank God for herbal tea) but I found myself doing better as I got farther away from that last drink.
Friday night was hard. We went to be late, and then my daughter started with night terrors at 2 a.m. I was up with her until 5:30 a.m. I went back to bed until 7, when I had to get up for an event I was coordinating on Saturday. I was exhausted and sore from hours in the rocking chair. I decided my moratorium on coffee wasn't happening and got a big mug of it on my way. I drank coffee all day long.
We were home by 5 p.m. Friday, and I commenced my cooking frenzy. And I drank. A lot. So much so I don't remember going to bed. But then I was up with no problem, before my alarm at 5:30. Up early enough to go downstairs, tidy up the kitchen, get ready for the day and confront the fact that I fell off the wagon. I wasn't exactly clear-headed but I managed to get a lot done before leaving the house at 8:30.
I know I have a drinking problem. I see that clearly right now. But what I don't understand is why drunk me runs circles around the rest of the world, and sober me struggles. Obviously, I need to develop some life skills. Just not sure how to go about doing that.
No comments:
Post a Comment